Since my recent description of the lurking dangers of fish farms thoroughly soured many of you on salmon, I feel it’s my duty to suggest alternative food sources.

We could take the Bucklands as a culinary guide, father and son both excelling in devouring the most outlandish food possible. William, the father, served hedgehogs, roast ostrich, porpoise, crocodile steaks and even cooked puppies in 19th century England. It seems he liked the notoriety gained by an unusual diet, starting with mice on toast for breakfast, and once eating, it is claimed, the 140ish-year-old mummified heart belonging to King Louis XIV of France. Long story, details here.

He was otherwise a reputed if eccentric scientist and eventually became Dean of Westminster Abbey. His son Francis followed in his footsteps. “Guests were served steaming plates of boiled elephant trunk, boiled and fried meat taken from the head of a porpoise, roasted giraffe necks and rhinoceros pie. Boa constrictor, sea slugs and ear wigs made their way to his stomach, although he ended up hating those last two. When he heard a panther had recently died at a zoo, he had the curator dig up the corpse and send over some panther chops (“It was not very good.”)

Francis was actually concerned with finding alternatives to help stave off over-hunting and over-fishing. He founded the Acclimation Society of Britain; its goal was to find and introduce exotic fauna to the country in order to gain another food source. Well, that would obviously not do for our own kitchens given how many of these are on the endangered species list.

Marmots were among his menagerie, ready to be picked up by cook when supper was needed. It turns out, though, that we should exercise caution before turning to fry, steam or boil rodents, or, for that matter, eat them raw.

I’m sure you’ve heard: the recent demise of a Mongolian couple after a supper of marmot meat was all over the news. And what did them in? The bubonic plague! I know, it should not be treated lightly when people try to find their protein where they can and then succumb to the plague. But really.

If you think you are safe because those rodents are not on your meal plan, though, think again. The disease lurks in Oregon as well and officials here are practicing what to do in case of an outbreak.

In the meantime, this is what the government suggest you do:

• Yes, plague can be prevented by controlling rodent populations in endemic areas.
•   Eliminate sources of food and nesting places for rodents around homes, workplaces, and recreation areas; remove plant material, rock piles, junk piles,and potential food supplies, such as pet food.
•   Control your pet’s fleas and do not let cats or dogs roam freely.
•   Do not pick up or touch dead animals.
•   Wear insect repellant to prevent fleabites and wear gloves when handling potentially infected animals.

I guess it’s back to chocolate pudding and Fritos, for this here diner…

Photographs today are of pica and muskrats respectively. Cute. Rodents. Bubonic plague……

And for your listening pleasure there are rats, mice and marmots on offer!